Saturday, 5 November 2016

Home

Its not the place you were born..not even the place you were raised really..but a place where you met yourself face to face for the first time. It's that place you knew instinctively, as you breathed it in, that you were a part of it and it was a part of you. And there, deep in your core, you realized relief. Not at all because you weren't sure if you were returning or discovering it for the first time, but.. because you had arrived.
Home is not only a familiar place. It's a state of mind. It's transcendental. It's friends and family and lovers. It's that large tree you rush to in a rain storm and that satisfied feeling you get as you just arrive under its shelter, with that genuine smile. A sigh of relief, when all around you are grey showers, you remain sheltered and dry. Home is that moment in a small cafe, in a large foreign city full of strangers, when an old friend suddenly appears to share a few moments and a coffee.Some few friends are a lot like home.
Home, it's that few seconds in a raging night, the brief relief from some constant grief, when your dream brings you your lovers embrace, the touch of her lips and the scent of her hair in the night. That's home.
I ache to be home.

Gunner©
For Pegs, who "feels" deeply and understands where true wealth lives.

Tuesday, 4 June 2013

The Book of Unsaid



I remember when I saw you that very first time, at school on the very first day
You were running and laughing with your ribboned curls and a dress of flowers
If I could have been that brave I’d have told you I liked you and wanted to play
And maybe we could swing together on the bars or play king of towers
But instead, I walked away, and it remained painfully unsaid.

I remember you arriving at church for your First Communion
Your long curls wrapped in fine lace, your gown as pure as falling snow
If I could have been that brave I'd have told you I’d like to be your companion
And maybe walk you up that aisle as far as we could go
But instead, I walked away, and it remained painfully unsaid.

The grade eight graduation party was such a happy event
You arrived with the Italian kid and you looked beautiful and full of joy
If I could have been that brave, I’d have told you my eyes followed you where ever you went
And maybe if you would notice me just once you might think I could be your boy
But instead, I walked away, and it remained painfully unsaid.

I saw you daily at high school for years
Your beauty and mind developed to the breathtaking woman that you had become
You had been wearing that football players jacket so long it brought me to tears
If I could have been that brave, I’d have told you I play sports too, would you like to come?
But instead, I walked away, and it remained painfully unsaid.

I saw your picture in the newspaper one day, bold and large in the celebration section
Your eyes a brilliant bright and your beauty easily conveyed. A tenth year wedding reflection
If I could have been that brave, I’d have told you how I wish I could have shared your life, have you for my wife and that somehow I’d lost my direction
But instead, I walked away, and it remained painfully unsaid.

I remember I saw you for the very last time, at the school for your grandsons very last day
You were running and laughing with your ribboned curls and a dress of flowers
If I could have been that brave, I’d have told you I had loved you my whole life away
And maybe we could swing together or watch the children play king of towers
But instead, I walked away, and it remained painfully unsaid.

Gunner ©

Wednesday, 19 December 2012

A sack full of pain.


The blood of another brother
Heaped a load of hurt on my mother
My father driven insane would never be the same
His only gain from hiding his pain like a sack full of shame

Digging for gold, he wasn’t that old
Twenty-one, if you need to be told
Pounding rock in a hole when four ton of loose let go like a noose
Ending his life in a flash like a slash of a knife

It’s a sad thing to say at the end of the day
After you’ve picked up your tools and worked like fools
That your largest gain was a sack full of pain
And that toil and strife would map the end of a life

The hole in the ground was the place he was found
His tram a wreck but he couldn’t give a damn, not with his broken neck
There was dirt in his eyes and it was all washed aside
When Mama bent over him and her tears fell while she cried

So it was the end of October with the autumn winds on our shoulders
I pulled him out of the ground and took him to town
We wrapped him in a blue suit and laced on some new boots
They dug a new hole; we pushed him in low, and threw some loose upon him

And we that’s left behind got up and walked to the mine
We picked up our tools and we worked like fools
And it’s a sad thing to say at the end of the day
That our largest gain was a sack full of pain

Gunner ©

Tuesday, 20 November 2012

Immersed in Gratitude


It’s hardly a few minutes before the crack of dawn
My alarm sounds off with a cathedral song
The coolness of the air a small sting when I throw off the sheet
And I’m suddenly aware of a small thing, I breathe.

I breathe in slow, a thirty count, and exhale
What is a long breath? Without it life would pale
I breathe in and hold till I gasp
My chest all tight my mind racing fast

I breathe! And I’m immersed in gratitude!

There on my left, my woman my wife
I recall her first morning in my arms; she became part of my life
Her heart a smooth beat there near her breast
A sweet whisper and her breath across my chest

She breathes! And I’m immersed in gratitude!

A rustling in the next room, my son's normal grumble
He flies down the stairs in a reckless tumble
I recall his very first breath, for his lungs a first test
When he joined us on our march to an inevitable death

He breathes! And I’m immersed in gratitude!

I hear the big lake throw her waves on my shore
Her tides come and go sometimes close to my door
Her lungs filled with all manner of life
The moon is her lover and he hugs her, each day twice

She Breathes! And I’m immersed in gratitude!

And through the glass pane before I rise
I see the twinkling of heaven's stars in the sky
A thousand suns born and spun
The universe alive with stardust and galaxies known to none

It breathes! And I’m immersed in gratitude!

Gunner©

Tuesday, 23 October 2012

Absolution




Little David Mallet was the toughest nail in town.
Leaner and meaner than most and closer to the ground.
Fighting and thieving had been the story of his life
He had fists like iron claws and barbed wire teeth; he was a master with a knife

Big Jack Hammer was a slow and easy walker
And though its rumored he had indeed spoke once, he was not an eager talker
Built like a big old oak tree, he always seemed at ease
And its true you could suddenly find him standing in an empty place, unexpectedly

Sexy Mary Brown was the dream of every guy; she was the sweetest girl around
She had a long stride and batting eyes, she could turn a man to a panting hound
She loved to dance and she loved to prance and music turned her on
So you took your chances, made your advances, but you always end up gone

Now you know that David was the rooster of the walk; he sure did like to crow
And if you saw him prowling somewhere on the block, Jack was sure to be in tow
Together they had no fear, they shed no tears: they always shared their beer
And David knew when the blades were drew, Jack would be there too.

On the 8th of August, when the nights were hottest, the music played till dawn
And in the night, David caught Mary in his sight and over her he did fawn
They swirled and twirled, he held her close, she fell in tighter than most
He smoothed her well, she bought his tell and they left together when the dead bolt fell.

It was still dark when they crossed to the park and David wanted a kiss
He spun her round and forced apart her lips, but she whispered “No, no. Not like this”!
With a familiar rage he knocked her around and pushed her to the ground
She fought for her life and he pulled out his knife, “How do you want to be found?”

Big Jack Hammer was a slow and easy walker, not an eager talker
But his fists were heavy, they landed a bevy, and he dragged David off her
The flash of steel brought an end to the deal, and David went down hard
And he wondered how a man could move so well and find him caught off guard

And when the darkness came it was the end of Dave and no one felt any pain
And its rumored Jack spoke once, and its said he had the same to say again
“It was like the taste of a fine whiskey, my retribution.
But now, it’s a long and sober path over the mountain to absolution.”
Gunner ©